So dear reader, thank goodness I have a chip and pet passport otherwise I would not have experience the madness that is King's day in Amsterdam. I am sorry for not posting more regularly but I accidentally ate a brownie that someone dropped and I've been out of it for a while! King's day seems to be an excuse for the world's youth to decend on the Netherlands and congregate like a collection of escaped extras from "Orange is the new Black". 

So they were under starters orders as they began the Corgi Derby. Thanks BBC for the photo. These little legged demons charged down the course with the speed of a sausage falling off a table and into my mouth! The event was supported by more people this year which was a good thing, although none of them ran I note, need to get on message with the Crufts lot!It was great to see that royalty even graced them with their presence. No not the sadly departed QEII but Judy Murray!

At a recent meeting of the kennel club, not the one by Crufts but the meeting spot outside Sainsbury where all humans leave us to go shopping, Bertie the basset hound stepped down as leader. I was elected to be in charge but what should my title be?  Samantha, know as Sam, is very politically correct and we got into a debate about correctness. That's rich coming from her as "she" is a King Charles Spaniel. Anyway Terry said Chairbitch, which didn't go down well. He argued that chairdog was not okay. Finally we agreed on Chaircannine a bit of a jowl full but best to appease all. It did mean we started a discussion on whether we had owners who were members of the huperson race?  I recalled my owners had been to Canada and seen gease. Were they Canadian gease as they were in Canada? As an aside if I had been born in Tibet would I have just been a terrier?  This seems to be a challenge for all personkind!

Laying on the carpet, thinking a lot about nothing, I looked up at the right moment! A dog with two humans was entering the dragon's den! Poor humans seem to have to rely on fingers to identify each other. We dogs use smell, of course, but blow me down; it turns out every dog's nose is unique, too! 

I don't like my new Oura Ring, I love it. But it gives my humans far too much information about what I've been up to. I overheard them looking at the data and commenting about my step count. Neither of them recall taking me for a long walk, but I covered some distance last Sunday night! Truth be told, Larry, my labrador friend, came around with his unique"'eau de dead crow", which he wanted me to get a good sniff at. I know I'm a pedigree, but come on, girls, who can resist a fella with a delicious smell? So there was nothing for it but to slip out my dog flap and stroll across the fields.

After a routine visit to the vets they told my humans that I needed to increase my exercise. What the white coat man says goes. Any argument is only barking up the wrong tree. 

Is it only me who gets the irony that the handler has more hair than the winner? Don't misunderstand me; I'm pleased that the bearded handler did the best trot around the rink and was awarded a bottle of champagne. I am assuming the booze is for him and not my canine colleague. I hope they didn't pin that rosette on the whippet. There's not a lot of fat on the poor thing, and it could hurt! I'm a little disappointed that we Tibetan Terriers once again missed out. Whippets have had four wins at the show, and we TTs have not had a look in since Willy (Araki Fabulous Willy) won it in 2007. Speaking of kennel names, just to let you know, my KC name is Africa Dawns Lady Saucey, and boy, have I lived up to that! There is a definite bias to English Cocker Spaniels, which have won the most times with seven titles. Mind you, if I told you what they get up to in their spare time, they'd all be banned. I'm just saying the clue is in the name! See you next week. Tibbs 

Ready to sit down by the fire on Sunday and watch the special that is Crufts?

'Significant amount' of palm oil found on beach starts the article for this week's blog. As my owner often says "don't give me any of your old soft soap", I thought.

It's time to vote for your hero dog HERE. 

So there I was with a little bit of matting. Try Botox, the hairdresser said. Since I wasn't paying, I jumped at the chance to get some extra pampering. It beats having your glands done, trust me!!! 

I am out taking my owner for a walk. Who should I see but my old friend? She's pretty tiny, really, pocket-sized, in fact, and her owners have decided to call her by what many think is a common name for a dog. When asked, her owners proudly announce she's called "FIDO"; that's very original, say most. Yes, "FYDOUGH is not that common, really", they reply, smugly pointing at her tag. Fy, as we call her, gets into all sorts of trouble since her people brought a cat into the house. For a laugh, she started copycatting. That was fine when only the cat saw and was outraged, but Fy got spotted, and the next thing she knew, she was performing on TikTok and reported in the News!